There’s a line in a movie I just finished watching that I want to share. The movie is The Farewell, starring Awkafina, who is phenomenal in the film as the protagonist who returns to China with her family to spend time with her beloved grandmother, only to hide a pretty big secret from her.

When Akwafina’s character doesn’t get a coveted fellowship she had hoped to get, her grandmother tells her that she’ll be okay. That in the end, it isn’t what you do, but how you do it, that’s important.

That line just struck me like nobody’s business: It isn’t what you do, but how you do it.

In my mind, what resonated as my interpretation of the line is this:

Stop chasing after all the things that you think you need in order to be happy, but instead, focus on how you do it. Going through life learning how to stress less, learning to be kinder to yourself and others is part of that how. What if learning to breathe through the day, to rush less, to enjoy others and not beat up on yourself for all the things you didn’t do, didn’t do right, was the most important part of it all?

There are so many reasons to watch that movie, but that’s the line that’s shouting out at me. And that’s the main thing I want to share for now.

 

Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash


Lily Chien-Davis

I am a writer curious about all the ways we feed bliss into our minds and bodies. With the short time we all have on this earth, how might we be our best selves with ourselves and each other? I enjoy sharing what I am still learning to be a better human.

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